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Dear Mom, Juggling your business and babies

I have been feeling so grateful this week as some exciting things in my business are happening and it brought me back to remembering the time when I thought it would NEVER happen.

For the past 5 years I have been trying to run my business with small toddlers at home, a deployed spouse, moving 4 times (yes 4 times in 5 years). I often felt like I was either rocking my business and failing my family or rocking my family life and letting my business suffer. The guilt was out of control!

I can't tell you how many times I felt like everyone was having their careers take off and here I was changing diapers and losing my mind all wishing I could be them. I cried on the floor of my office many times, and decided to throw in the towel even more than that. I can't tell you how many times I posted on my facebook "I quit! I'm done, I can't do it!"

I tried everything, from hiring help, to folders and binders, all sorts of organizational programs and even accountability partners. No matter how hard I tried I just couldn't make it all work. What IS wrong with me? I thought. I'm just not good at this, I guess I'm just not wired to get the laundry done and make dinner. I fed my family dino nuggets 5 nights this week and yet I still am drowning? What gives?!